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The SA forums faq

By anotherone, unless otherwise noted

1: HALP! I'm new here and people make fun of me no matter what I post!

The Section where I help newbies
OK, if you're a newbie, there are a number of things you should know. Everything you need to know not to be banned from the board is listed in the forum rules. If you haven't read them you're asking for it. And don't say that you haven't seen the link, because whenever you try to reply it says "Read the fucking forum rules before posting!" right above where you type. So after you read that, read the "official" FAQ here. That will save you from making posts that say "HOW DO I POST IMAGES?/" which will get you flamed back to the stone age. After you read those two documents, read The Official Anotherone Newbie Guide!. Which is this thing right here.

Before you post anything, and I do mean anything, lurk for about two weeks at the very least. That means read every thread, and do not post anywhere. Read the exchanges between users. Note that ppl who tlak leik tihs and say u and r and ur and pls rarely go anywhere on the forums. Note that people who ask dumb questions get flamed. Note that there are a great many unwritten rules. (I'm trying to catalogue them, but I will miss some.) Note that you can edit and delete your posts and threads. This is a big one. You can also close your own threads. This is vastly underused- if your thread turns into a dinosaur game you can simply close it by scrolling to the bottom and clicking "Close Thread".

Look at the Gas Chamber. Learn from the mistakes of others. Look in the Goldmine. Learn from the genius of others.

Do not try to spark debates, but be prepared to defend yourself. Flamewars are never good, but they happen. Grow a sense of humor or get out. Some people are assholes, plain and simple. A little bit of conflict is good, but people who go out of their way to cause trouble are assholes and everyone else on the forums thinks it. Don't worry about it if someone is being a complete asshole to you, most likely (unless you're just retarded) public opinion is on your side. 

If there's anything that you are SURE is not answered in this FAQ, the Forums FAQ, or the forum rules; and you honestly can't figure it out on your own, add me to your ICQ list list and talk to me from there. If you don't have ICQ, get it.

2: SA stuff 

Why doesn't Lowtax run ad banners?
Because there is almost no market for ad banners nowadays, especially on independent E/N style websites. He used to, of course; but after not being paid for months at a time, he decided to run his own ads. The fake ads he runs now were (for the most part) designed by goons, mocking the old eFront ads.

How can I donate money to Lowtax if I don't have paypal?
Email Fistgrrl. fistgrrl@somethingawful.com.com.

Where did Lowtax's name come from?
There was a politician a while back who called himself Byron "Low Tax" Looper. He was slated to lose the election, so he murdered his opponent. (AP story on the topic) Rich liked the guy's spunk and took the name upon himself..

What happened to Wow That's Amazing, Bjorner B., and Taco?
Lowtax changed ISPs a few months back, and the new one didn't allow multiple FTP accounts. Since these were the only three Hosted sites that were actually someone other than Lowtax (or Fragmaster, who 'tax trusts with the main password), they were simply moved to different servers. Wow That's Amazing is gone (although it may be back sometime), Bjorner B. is here, and Taco The Wonder Dog (TAOC TEH WODNER DOUGH) is here. 

So you mean that Jeff K. is fake?
Oh, heh, no, not at all! Jeff K, Cliff Yablonski, Leonard "J" Crabs, and L-Bone all live together in a one-room apartment in East Appleton with Santa Claus and the tooth fairy.

Can I bbe a moderator?
No.

What should I put in my sig?
Anything you want, as long as it falls within the rules. 3 lines of text and 2 images, with a total of smaller than 60k.
NOTE however, that if your sig is too large people will complain that your sig is too big.
What you actually put in it doesn't matter. NOTE: porn or other disgusting things are not acceptable in signatures. While posting porn will usually get your post edited and put you on probation, putting bad things in your sig will get you banned quickly.

What is the picture archive?
How do I get my picture added to the archive?
How do i get my cam added to the portals?
How do i get a sagoons.com email address?
These questions are answered on the sagoons.com website here.

Why does Lowtax charge for accounts now?
Lowtax handles that question pretty well here. Let me add; this is the BEST thing that's happened to the forums in as long as I can remember. So many fewer morons post. The fact that any yahoo can't just get an account now, combined with the lower tolerance for breaking rules, has had a Darwinian effect on the forums.

Why can only mods use the and icons?
Because.

What were the various image macros?
[img-amazing]
[img-hooray]
[img-captobvious]
[img-yes]
[img-awesome]
[img-ohno]
[img-ohbaby]
[img-blownaway]
[img-timeline] - Note that there were dozens of variations of this one. Things were added before "You Are Here" such as "Birth of Finagler" (replacing "Birth of Black Jesus" after he admitted that he was 30 years old) and "Olsens Twins release first porn" slightly after "NOW". Other interesting variations included a back to the future style "split" timeline which had "Our 1985" and "Alternate 1985 where Biff stole sports almanac and owns Hill Valley." Using this image for any reason is REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING and should not be done. It's now common to post the timeline for timeline, since it's old. This starts a giant timeline posting loop which consumes the entire forum in a giant timeline black hole. Using img-timeline will get you banned.
There were more but I don't remember them. Sorry.

3: Technical stuff

Where can I get free webspace to use for my images?
Most free space providers nowadays banish outside image linking. Some that allow it:

• Freedom2Surf- 20 megs of space, and you get http://www.foo.f2s.com as your URL. Downside: It's slow and it's down often.
• Virtual Ave- It's a lot faster but you have to give them your credit card number. It's free though, the CC# is just to make sure one person doesn't get 40 accounts.
• Check with your own ISP- a lot of places will give you webspace just for asking.

Where can I find images to use for stuff?
The master of all image search engines is at http://images.google.com/.

What HTML tags can I use?
You can't use HTML, but you can use "vbcode". Here's a quick rundown of what's allowed:

[i]italics[/i]
[b]bold[/i]
[u]underline[/u]
[mod]This is a special tag that lets you easily use all three of the above tags without a lot of typing.[/mod]
[quote]This text will be put in a special quote block.[/quote] Note: You can use just [/quote], which puts a horizontal line in your post.
[code]Puts your code in a "code block," which is like a quote block except it's monospaced. Use it for your code and ASCII art.[/code]
[s] This tag USED to be strikethrough, but a certain Pokey the Penguin Obsessed goon overused it and drove it into the ground. Now using it shows the following: I AM A FAG![/s]
[url="http://www.somethingawful.com"]Something Awful[/url] or just [url]http://www.somethingawful.com[/url]
[img]http://www.goatse.cx/hello.jpg[/img] (This will display whatever image is at that URL.)

If that didn't make much sense you can see the REAL forums vbCode list here.

Glossary:

{{{{{{{X}}}}}}}}: See Huggles.

1337: "leet". A bastardization of 31337 which in turn is a bastardization of Elite. Basically, "cool". It's traditional to take a screenshot of your 1337th post and flaunt it in your sig, however; since postcounts are off currently, that's not very possible. You can, of course, see your post count in your profile page, but that's really kind of lame if you look there after every post.

404 Tard: The guy on Something Awful's 404 Error: Page not found page. Widely speculated to be male.

Aces!: Usage: "Aces, another fucking foo thread!" Basically just, "Oh look, another thread about foo!" This started with an image macro which displayed "ACES! ANOTHER FUCKING ZERO WING THREAD!", used whenever someone posted a thread about AYBABTU.

All About Goatse.cx: One day, 20 of the 50 threads on the first page of GBS were about goatse. Lowtax created AAG to make a place for discussions about large anal openings to live. This was later merged with FYAD to create FYAG.

AAS: See All About Sex.

All About Sex: A forum where morons discuss sex. Features lots of incest. The Goons invaded it briefly and brought back several catchphrases, most notably P-Due and K THX BYE.

Ass Sandwich: A sandwich made from ass and poo. No other explanation is offered.

AYBABTU and AYB: See All Your Base Are Belong To Us.

All Your Base Are Belong To Us: A quote from an old Sega game, "Zero Wing." Tom posted a thread with this as the subject and the phrase "ON THE TABLE" as the only text. By the end of the first page, people had started randomly photoshopping AYBABTU on various items. It caught on in more ways than one and "All your foo are belong to bar" became the new way of speaking. The Laziest Men on Mars made a song out of it, someone else stole the song and made a music video out of it, and together the phrase became famous. It's now completely cliché and using the phrase on the forums can get you lynched. NOTE: TV's Ian has done a much better job than I could, see his History of AYB.

Appleton City: The (Fictitious, sorry) city where several something awful characters reside, including Cliff Yablonski, and L-Bone.

Attention Whore: In these forums it refers to someone who wants constant attention and tries to get it by doing things like starting numerous threads about her/himself. Once reserved for women only, I believe the definition now covers men as well. (HPopper)

Banned: To have your account deleted. Once you're banned, you can't come back... usually. Some people get on Lowtax's good side, apologize; or somehow achieve amnesty and get back in. Banning happens when you break any of the so-called "mortal rules".

BBAB: BritishBornandBread. That's the redheaded boy you often see photoshopped onto various people. Allegedly he doesn't look like that anymore, but who can tell with those brits? [1] [2] Note that he no longer looks like that.

British Bulldog: Also B. Bulldog: A gimmick poster who mocked everyone in a British Soccer Hooligan style. It turned out that he actually was a british soccer hooligan, and he almost became accepted... until he posted a thread saying that he was sorry for being annoying, his dad didn't want him posting anymore, and he might return someday. The next day, he came back as "dpph-lurker" (His account was banned when he said he was leaving- it's forum policy.) and accused Al and a few others of conspiring to have him banned. (The ironic thing is, Al is an admin and could simply ban him.) He later sent an email to Lowtax saying that he and a few other banned posters were planning something big to destroy Something Awful completely. After some time passed and nothing happened, a few other goons received emails containing crazed threats and other sundry ravings of a lunatic.

Oddly enough, only days after he threatened to do something "big" that would "Destroy something awful", Lowtax got a legal notice that DPPH was infringing on copyrights and must be shut down immediately.

But did you get head? (Catch phrase) A poster named Urine Therapy posted lots and lots of threads about his sex life. Eventually it became traditional to reply to them with "But... did you get head?". Eventually this phrase spread to the rest of the forums. Note: you can be banned if you say this. It's that lame.

Camel Spider: A huge spider that will eat your face. More

Can I have some winamp?: (Catch phrase) Dr. Eldarion received an email from a random person containing only this text. It became a long photoshop thread.

Custom Title: The little thing under your username and when you registered. You can change it with a low, low one time payment of $10. Details at the bottom of this page.

Dinosaur Game: A device used to diffuse trolls. The idea of the game is simple. Find a picture of a dinosaur somewhere on the internet and post it in the offending troller's thread. If you are not the first person to post a dinosaur pic, try to follow the previous poster's pic by matching either the color or the species. (much like the card game Uno) (HPopper) See Hijack.

DPPH: Don't Post Porn Here. Unfortunately, everyone did, and it got shut down when a lawyer threatened to sue. See the British Bulldog saga for an interesting anecdote. There may or may not be a secret backup DPPH, get in touch with Stuntcock for the details.

eFront: Former hosts of SA. See the whole story here: http://efront.cjb.net Basically Something Awful was hosted on eFront for a few months, during which time Lowtax was employed by eFront. He should have been paid some huge amount of money, but instead he got $40 and an encyclopedia set or something. eFront was run by this guy named Sam Jain. Someone hacked into his computer and stole ICQ logs in which he says stuff like "I'm going to rape and spit on my websites." real nice guy.

E/N: Originally Entertainment/News, but it's slowly changed to Everything/Nothing. You know those stupid websites like Stileproject that post Everything, but they're really about Nothing? That's what E/N threads are about. Nothing. Usually this tag is used when the thread is about whoever's life in general. Don't go to these threads if you don't like angst.

FAP: The sound of one masturbatory stroke. Usually they come in packs of three- FAP FAP FAP. Stolen from http://www.sexylosers.com//The Thin H line.

Forum Invasion: Morons decide it would be a good idea to go annoy other people in other forums as much as possible. I believe it was Brock Landers who popularized the idea with the SAAN invasion. (HPopper)

FYAG: See Fuck You And Goatse.
FYAD: See Fuck You And Goatse.

Fuck my flesh: Someone posted a thread (possibly fictional) about how they pranked a person at their work through a series of events which all involved showing him hello.jpg image from goatse.cx. The coworker allegedly exclaimed FUCK THE FLESH!. A very odd reaction indeed...

Fuck You And Goatse: The forum to keep all flamewars and disgusting pictures in. It used to be called "Fuck you and die" until it was merged with "All about goatse".

Gamefan: A bunch of morons who couldn't find their ass with both hands and a stick equipped with ass-finding radar. They hosted SA for a while, but neglected to pay Lowtax. He left and went to eFront... which really wasn't much better.

Gamequoter: A user who posts nothing but screenshots from old videogames. One of the best Gimmick Posters. A god among men. Update: He can actually type- he wrote a very nice thread after the 9-11 tragedy. He also does game reviews for Artfag's website here.

Gas Chamber: The Comedy Gas Chamber is where stupid threads go to die. Note that this used to be called "The Dungeon." The Dungeon came about when some morons complained that their wonderful threads were just disappearing with no explanation. Lowtax created The Dungeon to show that their threads were not disappearing due to a server problem, but rather because they sucked.

Gas Chamber Challenge: When the Gas Chamber first debuted, people would say things like "OH, I BET THIS IS GOING TO THE GAS CHAMBER!". Lowtax (actually it was Captain Yams, but that's a different story) issued the Gas Chamber Challenge: if you say that a thread is going to the gas chamber, and it doesn't; you're banned. So then people said stupid things like "I WILL TAKE THE GAS CHAMBER CHALLENGE!". So the GCC was changed slightly: if you say anything close to "THIS THREAD IS GOING TO THE GAS CHAMBER! HAHAHAHA" you'll be banned.

GBS: General Bullshit. The main forum.

Geno: Someone posted a thread about this website called "Habbo Hotel", an interesting cross between AOL chat rooms and Command And Conquer style real-time strategy games. An invasion was hastily assembled. We were to create a new character using all grey clothing items and a name in the format "GenoX" where X was a number. Most of the classic Geno lines- "Follow the path, the path is grey" were made up on the spot. It's since grown into a pseudo-religion based on unity through conformity... Nobody takes this seriously, though. It's a joke, laugh.

Gimmick Poster: A user who posts on one theme and one theme only. Example: Period Guy, who posted only a "." Some gimmick posters are embraced and become regulars, such as GameQuoter; while most are banned and flamed incessantly. It's not worth it, trust me. Often, established posters create extra gimmick accounts and use them when needed. Gimmick posters are now grounds for banning, both of your gimmick account and your normal account, unless they're hilariously funny.

Goatse: To send someone to a website such as Goatse.cx or comp-u-geek with cruel intentions. Pronounced "Goat-see." Please keep all goatse-related threads in "Fuck You And Goatse".

Goatse.cx: A very, very bad website. Features a man (labeled "The Receiver" pulling his own anus open for the camera. Often people are sent to the website rather than a real website. Example: "Where can I find X?" "here." Widely considered lame. There is another picture on this website labelled "The Giver," of a man with a very large penis. See also Goatse and tacoinspector. All goatse related items are now considered lame and might even get you banned if an admin happens to be bitchy that day.

Goon: Someone who frequents either the Something Awful Forums or the IRC #sa, or both.

Grabulsa: King Grabulasa was one of the names of the villian in Lowtax and Jeff K.'s joint article "The Erotic Adventures of Moon Patrol." The villian's name changes at least once, and Grabulasa is the more memorable name. It's now used randomly because it just sounds cool.

Hack The Gibson (Also numerous variations, such as HAx0R tEh GIB0n!!) This is from the 1995 movie "Hackers". The plot involved Hacking into the Gibson, a giant supercomputer. It's evolved into an all-purpose catchphrase about hacking into stuff.

Hijack: A thread hijack is what happens when the conversation is derailed. Suddenly a conversation about Red China will turn into a discussion of the finer points of Soup. It's scary. NOTE: Some of the meaner-spirited people in the forums will TRY to hijack threads. If you see a picture of a dinosaur (See Dinosaur Game), or ANYTHING about Mario Kart, RUN.

Huggles: Hugs + Snuggles. You've seen 'em, I'm sure. French (curly) brackets around a name: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{anotherone}}}}}}}}}}}}}}. A way of showing affection. May or may not be from SAAN. 

I AM WIN!!: A former poster. He often started threads about various conspiracy theories and supernatural occurrences. (This spawned the mini-catchphrase "IT SI A CONSPIRACY!!", complete with Jeff K style spelling) One day someone happened to be browsing the portals and they noticed that I AM WIN!! appeared to be pleasuring himself. Closer inspection of his live webcam showed that he was, in fact, masturbating. Many threads were posted mocking the poor guy. When he found out about it, he went ballistic (And I personally don't blame him. I mean, c'mon, for a bunch of people who post FAP FAP FAP in response to nearly anything we're awfully hypocritical.) He posted a big long thread about how he was leaving and subsequently banned. Now, he's back; and better than ever.

I jsut wanted to bbe a moderator: TastyArmageddon allegedly attempted suicide when he was banned. This immortal phrase, typos and all, was typed while his wrists were (allegedly) slashed. We've turned it into a catchphrase- because that's the kind of comedy we LIKE! (Note to those of you sickened by this: He didn't really attempt suicide, that was almost certainly a prank. Nobody knows who was pranking who, though...) Note that he got to briefly bbe a moderator.

Image macro: "Canadian Maniac always posted the same image in response to almost any thread. It was 'Can't Stop The Music' and was a still from a VHS of some guy dancing or some shit. Lowtax publicly asked if we thought he should be banned if he continued it. Most said they didn't mind, or thought it was funny. I thought it was funny, but of we all knew course R-Lo could do whatever the flying fuck he wanted, as it is his server and his bandwidth. Basically everyone said they did not mind the repeated image.  

"About two days later Lowtax announced Macro Images, and for 2 fucking weeks every post was responded to with I'm Blown Away, [img-timeline], and a whole bunch of other annoying shit. Finally someone started a thread complaining that Macro Images were annoying and should be discontinued, to which Lowtax basically said, 'NO SHIT, YOU MEAN IT IS FUCKING ANNOYING WHEN THE SAME STUPID IMAGE IS POSTED AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN IN RESPONSE TO EVERY MOTHERNUNFUCKING THREAD????'" (Psycho Donut Killer)

Now, the term Image Macro refers to any frequently used image, usually with text proclaiming "YOU SUCK AT THE INTERNET!" or something.

[img-foo]: See Image Macro. A list of official [img-foo]s are above, but any common image that's used often can replace foo. [img-motorcycle.jpg] for instance.

IRC: All the COOL people hang out on somethingawful IRC. irc.somethingawful.com #sa. I lied. IRC is a scary place. Any time you see something on the forum that you don't understand, it's an IRC thing.

Jerry: Jeff K often makes reference to his friend Jerry. He's apparently fat and dumb, however "he" once "hacked" the forums and briefly took over.

K THX BYE: Another Once-very-popular SA catchphrase. It mocks the convention of using the sloppy e-mail/IM shorthand (e.g. "can u plz come back l8r ppl!"). (HPopper) I think that it was actually first seen on All About Sex.

King REoL:

Kurt Cobain Misquotes: A goon's sig had the line "It's better to fade out than burn away," attributed to Kurt Cobain. The quote is not from Kurt Cobain. The goon was repeatedly told this, and he bitterly denied that the quote came from anyone but the late Kurt Cobain. Before long other quotes began appearing in sigs, all attributed to Kurt Cobain: "You have nothing to fear but fear itself." - Kurt Cobain. "We can't stop here, this is BAT country!" -Kurt Cobain. You get the idea. Before long it became a full fleged forums fad. It's since faded away (rather than burning out, like so many catchphrases).
Kane Of Nod writes: "I think that quote is actually a misquote of a song known as "Hey, Hey, My, My (Into The Black)" by Neil Young. Off the top of my head, that's the way it sounds. A quick search on Google often has the wrong quote on Nirvana pages."

Leonard "J." Crabs: Lowtax's friend and lawyer, Leonard once discovered a new element called LINOLEUM which allows him to win any and all legal threats aimed at Lowtax. He's a legal bodyguard and he'd take a legal bullet for SA.

Lowtax: Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka, the leader of our fair forums. He writes nearly all of the content for Something Awful, and unlike a lot of website's admins, posts on the forums. An all around nice guy.

MSN hacking: Someone discovered that if you went to http://communities.msn.com/_Secure/tla, where "tla" was any three-letter-acronym, you could see a (seemingly random) picture. Nobody knows where the pictures were coming from, although the theory that it's stuff from MSN communities was tossed out and generally accepted. Nobody really cared why it worked, though; it was so much more fun to simply look at stuff. A number of programs were quickly thrown together that made browsing randomly easier; allowing several goons to amass several gigabytes of random MSN pictures. A very large percentage of the pictures were bad porn, some even illegal porn- kiddie, scat, bestiality, you name it. It started working briefly again at the end of September 2001, but was quickly fixed.

P-Due: Bizzare slang for penis. From All About Sex.

PAK CHOOIE UNF: The sound made by pusher robots. This is mostly nonsense, however see UNF.

Parody Thread: A thread that's a parody of another thread. For instance, a thread called "Someone stole my TV!" may be met with a parody thread called "Who wants to buy a TV, cheap?" This may cause Title Pairs. Considered lame, although it can be funny if pulled off correctly.

Photoshop: The name of a popular piece of photo editing software sold by Adobe. When I say "popular" I mean "POPULAR" in the sense that oxygen is popular. All of those wacky pictures with BBAB's head on someone else's body, or kids are staring at a floating dildo while exclaiming "AMAZING!" were done with photoshop or a clone thereof. It's common to get a warez (read: Stolen) version of photoshop, but those of us with ethics only use software if we can pay for it. (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) If you can't afford the rather steep price tag on photoshop, I'd encourage you to check out The Gimp, a free alternative.

Photoshop Thread: A thread dedicated to photoshopping a certain picture, subject, or catch phrase.

postcount++: It used to be that postcounts were displayed under a user's name. Unfortunately, many people reguarded postcounts like they would penis size, and goons became obsessed with having a large postcount. "Postcount++" (or "add one to postcount" for you non-programmer goons) was tacked on to pointless posts and was often posted by itself when the poster didn't really have anything to contribute to the current thread but wanted to up the size of his/her postcount. (HPopper)

Pusher Robot: A robot whose only purpose is to shove. See the famous ICQ prank "Space Robot Bonanza".

Roofle[s]: Means something is funny. A bastardization of ROFL, or Rolling On Floor Laughing.

ROOFLE OWNED SCRUB: Means that someone said something that "Owned" someone else. Replace Scrub as needed. History: It's a bit sketchy, but I think it was first coined by an imfamous troll named YOU-ARE-OWNED who said that quite a bit.

SAAN: see Smile And Act Nice.

Sam Jain: The guy who ran eFront. He single handedly screwed over dozens of webmasters, went bankrupt with eFront, then fled the country to- get this- Hawaii. He started a few new websites which are literally exact rip-offs of established sites.

Shover Robot: A robot whose only purpose is to push. See the famous ICQ prank "Space Robot Bonanza".

Smile And Act Nice: A website "By Girls, For Girls". Think of it as a female-oriented Something Awful. Several of the current forums posters migrated during a very large forum invasion which SA started and SAAN continued... *shudder*
Bobalbmi has this to say: A poster called "Brock Landers" (perhaps) linked to SAAN saying something to the effect of "Look at all the free pussy here". People from here then invaded their forums for a few days. Then the members of SAAN decided to retaliate, which led to the "Huggy wars" (cute things posted ad-nauseum). Everyone calmed down, and banned posters now often use that forum as an alternate to this one.

Something Awful Forum Goon Survivor: Based firstly on the CBS "Survivor" series, and secondly on Jeff K's parody of it (FPS Smartie man Gaem Designer Survivar). The SAFGS series depicts the attempts of a few famous forum goons to survive and be the last goon alive. SAFGS1 featured artfag, Eurononymus, Fiwer, TAOC THE WONDE DOUGH, Tossed Salad Man, I AM WIN!!, was written, directed, and drawn by Bolt Vanderhuge. It can be found here: http://www.geocities.com/chud_lord/survivor.htm. (Hekcorps) Note that there will someday be a SAFGS part 2.

Sometimes I fall down: a34 fell down once. One of his friends said to him, "MY NAME IS [A34], AND SOMETIMES I FALL DOWN." He felt the need to share, and it became a catchphrase.

Space Robot Bonanza: Simply the funniest ICQ prank ever. Seriously. Origin of many catch phrases- "PAK CHOOIE UNF," Pusher/shover bots, "Grandma is protected >> at the bottom of the stairs," "The terrible secret of space," and lots of stuff. Read it.

Tacoinspector: A specialized version of Goatse.cx run by a goon. Sending someone to http://www.tacoinspector.com/?goon=anotherone will send that person to goatse.cx and add one to the score for anotherone. Scores can be viewed at http://www.tacoinspector.com/stats/.

TastyArmageddon: AKA 'Tasty' A poster who was banned after a long and hostile saga. For a long, long time anything he posted was met with "FUCK OFF TASTY" images. He apparently had over 40 usernames he used, most of them stupid, stupid, STUPID gimmick posters such as "Triangle Guy," who simply posted a triangle in every thread. Fun Fact: He registered the 10,000th username, which was "TastyArmageddon owns you." Updated: Tasty is back, and he's actually behaving himself for now. He was briefly made a moderator, even. He's apologized for the mess, and he's a normal poster.

Terrism: Terrorism on the internet. Spawned from a King REoL typo.

The Laziest Men on Mars: Forums goon JRR's band. Their hits include The Invasion of the Gabber Robots (better known as "All your base are belong to us") and We Are Something Awful.

The Giver: Goatse man's friend with a very large penis.
The Receiver: The official name of the goatse man.
Note that these names are probably from the children's book "The Giver."

The terrible secret of space: See Space Robot Bonanza. Also a song by JRR and The Laziest Men On Mars.

Title Pairs: Two threads that appear next to each other on the forum page which appear to be related. For instance: "I found hell..." "In the library!". My all time favorite:

Note that occasionally these are created on purpose with thread titles like "...IN BED!". This gives you things like "What's your favorite game? ...IN BED?". See also Parody Threads.

Uglycat: Cliff Yablonski's only friend.

UNF: The sound made when having sex.

Urine Therapy: A former poster. He was known for posting a lot of threads that had to do with his apparently flourishing sex life. One day he posted a thread saying "I've got [some drug] (Ephedrin? don't remember), what should I do with it?" He had enough [some drug] to kill a horse. Eventually he posted that he'd taken it. A little while later he started talking nonsense about what it was like. Eventually posts from him stopped, and he hasn't been heard from since. Some think that he's dead, other think that it was just an elaborate way of leaving the forums. See also But did you get head?. NOTE: Fistgrrl says that Urine Therapy eventually came back and asked to banned. I can neither confirm nor deny this. Frankly, I like my version better.

Why You Throw Chip?: Here's the post that started it, by Euronymous:

"Anyway one time me and a friend were at a KFC, and he was throwing chips [French Fries -anotherone] around but nothing too serious, just into plants and out the window and shit. So anyway I throw one down the stairwell just as this
Asian slut is coming up and it hits her smack in the face. So she starts jabbering on and this Asian guy comes charging up the stairs towards me ( I assume its her boyfriend) he comes up and starts getting in my face saying "WHY? WHY YOU THROW CHIP? HUH?" and I said some lame response like "Oh, well I meant to just throw it down the stairs and she walked into it". So he does this little thing where he turns away like he's going to walk off, and then spins around and goes to punch me in the face, he's much shorter than me so instead it connects with the side of my neck.

Next thing I'm punching into his face and the top of his head (he's going down into a crouch) and my friend comes in with his knee and starts kneeing him in the face, then I lifted him up by his little jacket and slammed the back of his skull into a supporting pole. Meanwhile his girlfriend and some old Asian bitch are jumping all over us blabbering on in Korean or whatever, screaming at the top of their lungs so the whole of the kfc runs over to watch. Then this big black security guard chick (!) comes over and starts throwing her weight around wanting to know what's going on, I look down and the Asian dude is sitting on the floor holding his face which is dripping blood, so I run the fuck out of the shop and down the road a fair bit, I expected my friend to follow or someone from the kfc to give chase, nothing happened neither my friend nor security people followed.

So I cautiously walk back to see what the fuck my friend is doing and I see he's in there with 2 security guards trying to restrain him, and he's still trying to have a go at the Asian guy, and pretty much everyone in the shop yelling "COME ON THEN!!! FUCKING COME ON!!!" at the top of his lungs. Needless to say he's a bit of a psycho, he goes a bit crazy when he gets into a fight. So I go to the door and yell out "hey, fuckin come on man" and comes running out and we take off down the road. Next thing we hear some sirens so we pissed off down into the train station.
Fun.
And I didn't even get to finish my dinner."

WORST.foo.EVAR.: Originating from a line uttered by The Simpsons' Comic Book Guy, this is now used in many different occasions, including mutations of the phrase which are merely two words seperated by periods and followed by "EVAR." Also: BEST.FOO.EVAR. (HPopper) Note that the "Evar" is due to Comic Book Guy's accent, it's not a JeffKism.

Yams: SA doesn't  censor out bad words. We get rid of old catchphrases. Any time Lowtax gets tired of a word, it goes on the banned list. Rather than being blocked out by ***** like normal censoring scripts, the forums replace every letter of the blocked word with "yams". Currently (as of the time I write this) banned words include "FAP" and "goatse." Currently censored words: no words are censored currently

You Suck At The Internet: There was once a site called SadSites, which collected various websites the creator proclaimed "Sad". The design of the page, of course, was laughable; and the webmaster had NO sense of humor. He decided that Cliff Yablonski Hates You was sad, and added it. Lowtax posted a thread about it after someone emailed it to him. The webmaster of sadsites started spamming lowtax with all sorts of crazed stuff saying that Lowtax "Lost". What he lost wasn't explained. Eventually it was decided that Lowtax lost at the internet. Guri whipped out a picture with a picture that used to say "Page under construction", and changed the text to proclaim "You suck at the internet!" and it was started. AFTERMATH: Someone discovered that there was a bug in the guy's script that allowed people to vote for the "Saddest" site and exploited it, causing Cliff Yablonski to end up with (on a scale of 1-10, 10 being the worst) a NEGATIVE 10,000,000,000 or so. The guy got mad and changed the code so CYHY to always have +10.

yuo = fag0t: A phrase spawned by JeffK and popularized in the forums by a poster called Gravedigger, who would often reply to threads with only this phrase. This prompted Lowtax to censor it. (See yams) Gravedigger later went on to spam the hell out of the forums and get banned. (HPopper)

If you read something on the forums that isn't listed here that confuses you, search on Google or Everything2. Not everything is a wacky forums catch phrase, you know.

Thanks to (in no particular order): Fistgrrl, AlmightyPants, Mr. Adequate, The5kull, An Omnibus, Shadowen, Bobalbmi, L-ShapedTetrisBlock, Psycho Donut Killer, HPopper v 2.0, Lowtax (of course), I'll finish this later ;o)